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Blog entries categorized under Cat's Weird Recipes

Ham and Pineapple Pita Pizzas

Ingredients

4 pitas
8 ounces sliced deli ham
1 8-ounce ball fresh mozzarella, sliced
1 8-ounce can pineapple chunks, drained

Directions

Heat oven to 425° F.
Place the pitas on a baking sheet. Layer with the ham, mozzarella, and pineapple.
Bake until the pitas are crisp and the cheese has melted, 10 to 12 minutes.

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Sweet Lavender Scones (for Mother’s Day)!

Ingredients

3 cups all-purpose flour plus more for surface
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon dried lavender buds
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) chilled unsalted butter, cut into 1/4" cubes
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons buttermilk
2 teaspoons finely grated lemon zest
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 tablespoons sanding or granulated sugar
1 1/2 cups store-bought lemon curd

  • Arrange racks in upper and lower thirds of oven; preheat to 425°F. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper. Whisk 3 cups flour and next 5 ingredients in a large bowl. Add butter; rub in with your fingers until mixture resembles coarse meal.
  • Whisk 1 cup buttermilk, zest, and vanilla in a small bowl. Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients. Stir until shaggy dough forms.
  • Transfer to a lightly floured surface; knead until dough forms, about 5 turns. Pat into a 10x6" rectangle. Halve dough lengthwise. Cut each half crosswise into 4 squares. Cut each square diagonally in half into 2 triangles. Divide between baking sheets. Brush with 2 tablespoons buttermilk. Sprinkle with sanding sugar.
  • Bake until scones are golden and a tester inserted into the center comes out clean, 13-15 minutes. Transfer to wire racks; let cool.
  • Serve warm or at room temperature with lemon curd.

 

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Jowl Carbanara

Ingredients

5 oz guanciale unsmoked cured hog jowl
1 medium onion, finely chopped
1/4 cup dry white cooking wine
1 lb spaghetti
3 large eggs
1 1/2 oz Parmigiano-Reggiano, finely grated (3/4 cup)
3/4 oz Pecorino Romano, finely grated (1/3 cup)
1 teaspoon coarsely ground black pepper
1/4 teaspoon salt

  • Cut guanciale into 1/3-inch dice, then cook in a deep 12-inch heavy skillet over moderate heat, stirring, until fat begins to render, 1 to 2 minutes. Add onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until onion is golden, about 10 minutes. Add wine and boil until reduced by half, 1 to 2 minutes.
  • Cook spaghetti in a 6- to 8-quart pot of boiling salted water until al dente.
  • While pasta is cooking, whisk together eggs, Parmigiano-Reggiano , Pecorino Romano (1/3 cup), 1 teaspoon coarsely ground black pepper, and 1/4 teaspoon salt in a small bowl.
  • Drain spaghetti in a colander and add to onion mixture, then toss with tongs over moderate heat until coated. Remove from heat and add egg mixture, tossing to combine. Serve immediately.
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MINI-HAMBURGER COOKIES

You Will Need:

1 box vanilla wafers
1 package fudge-dipped chocolate cookies (like Keebler Fudge Shoppe)
1 can vanilla frosting
1 bag coconut
2 small mixing bowls
plastic bag
mixing spoons
butter knife

To Make Your Cookies:

First, tint your coconut by placing it in a plastic bag, and add a few drops of green food coloring. Then, shake the bag, until the coconut is tinted "lettuce green." If not, add additional coloring and continue to shake until the desired tint is reached. Next, divide the vanilla frosting equally into two small bowls. Into one bowl, add a drop or two of red food coloring, and stir. Add additional drops if needed to reach the desired "ketchup" color. Into the other bowl, add a drop or two of yellow food coloring and stir, adding more coloring until it has that nice "mustard" shade!

Now, we'll assemble our "burgers"! First, take a vanilla cookie, and using the butter knife, coat the flat side of the cookie with red icing. Then, take a fudge cookie, coat one side with the red icing, and sprinkle with tinted coconut. Press the iced sides of the cookies together, and set aside.Next, grab another vanilla cookie, and coat the flat side with yellow icing. Then, picking up your almost-finished "burger," coat the exposed side of the fudge cookie with yellow icing. Press the iced sides of the cookies together, and your burger's done!

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Wasabi Guacamole

Ingredients:

1 large ripe Hass avacado
1 large lime (juiced)  
1 tsp. wasabi paste
1 tsp minced pickled ginger
1 small garlic clove
1 pinch kosher salt
1 Tbs cilantro

Directions:

Halve the avocado, remove seed. With a paring knife, crisscross through the flesh; using a teaspoon, scoop out the diced flesh into a medium-sized bowl. Add the lime juice.

Using a fork or pastry blender, mash the avocado, leaving some texture. Add the wasabi paste, ginger, cilantro, garlic and a pinch of salt (to taste). Mix well.

Taste and adjust seasoning, adding more wasabi and salt if needed.

Serve with tortilla chips or deep-fried won ton triangles. Makes about 1 cup.

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Impossible Question

Q: Fri., May 18th: 35% of Americans do not want to do this?

 

A: Become rich

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